Red Hot to Asshole in 30 Seconds

Once upon a time I thought this guy (who I used to follow on Instagram) was hot. Very hot. Then I came across a post where he went off about how he’s straight and put them up there “for the ladies” but goddamnit! his pictures were “stolen” and now showing up on gay sites, and people are assuming that he’s gay.

And it’s just not fair!

Let me explain this, since obviously you sir, are an idiot. Once you put something on the internet, it can—and will—go everywhere. If you originally post sexy pictures of yourself on Instagram (or wherever), they will be shared and eventually find their way into the hands of gay men who for the most part don’t give a shit about whether you’re gay or straight in real life but will nonetheless fantasize about doing hundreds of unspeakable, mutually pleasurable things with you based on those photos—and will then pass said photos on ad infinatum. Deal with it, and consider yourself lucky that people find you attractive at all considering how—despite your good looks—what an awful, insecure person your childish rant has revealed you to be.

And frankly, with all your whining, “The lady doth protest too much, me thinks.”

I Call Bullshit

So apparently now if you’re a gay man and not sexually attracted to [black, brown, yellow, white…you fill in the blank] men, you’re a racist.

Give me a fucking break.

To pull a line from one of the great gay films of the 80s, Parting Glances, “I mean, your dick knows what it likes. You reach puberty, you don’t fucking decide what you like. You ask your dick. You say, ‘Hey, Dick, what do you like?’ and you go for it.”

Listen…during my many years of adult life on this planet, I’ve slept with pretty much every color of the rainbow. Admittedly it was sometimes out of curiosity (since until that time I hadn’t done it), and other times because the particular individual wanted me, but let’s face it: we all have our particular kinks, preferences, and fetishes, and I’ll be damned if going to be judged for it by some politically correct asshole.

And using this same type of reasoning the obvious question arises, are we sexist because we’re gay and not sexually attracted to women?


We Tried To Warn You

But you were having none of it because we were “Libtards.”

You voted for Trump because Clinton was going to be in Wall Street’s pocket. Trump wants to repeal Dodd-Frank and eliminate the Fiduciary Rule, letting Wall Street run rampant and return to its pre-2008 ways.

You voted for Trump because of Clinton’s emails. The Trump administration is running its own private email server.

You voted for Trump because you thought the Clinton Foundation was “pay for play.” Trump has refused to wall off his businesses from his administration, and personally profits from payments from foreign governments—in direct violation of the Emoluments Clause of the Constitution and grounds in and of itself for Impeachment.

You voted for Trump because of Clinton’s role in Benghazi. Trump ordered the Yemen raid without adequate intel, and then slept during the actual raid and upon waking tweeted about “FAKE NEWS” while Americans died as a result of his carelessness and insouciance.

You voted for Trump because Clinton didn’t care about “the little guy.” Trump’s Cabinet—in case you haven’t noticed—is full of billionaires, and he just took away your health insurance so he could give them a multi-million-dollar tax break.

You voted for Trump because he was going to build a wall and Mexico was going to pay for it. American consumers will pay for the wall via import tariffs, if not outright tax increases.

You voted for Trump because Clinton was going to get us into a war. Trump has provoked our enemies, alienated our allies, and given ISIS a decade’s worth of recruiting material.

You voted for Trump because Clinton didn’t have the stamina to do the job. Trump hung up on the Australian Prime Minister during a 5 pm phone call because “it was the end of a long day and he was tired and fatigue was setting in.”

You voted for Trump because foreign leaders wouldn’t “respect” ClintonForeign leaders—both friendly and hostile—are now openly mocking Trump.

You voted for Trump because Clinton lies and he “tells it like it is.” Trump and his administration lie with a regularity and brazenness that can only be described as shocking.

Let’s be honest about what really happened.

The reality is that you voted for Trump because you got conned. Trump is a grifter and the American people were the mark. Now that you know the score, quit insisting that this con-man is on your side.

Not This Time, Motherfuckers

Not. this. time.

I got on the subway in Manhattan tonight and found a Swastika on every advertisement and every window. The train was…

Posted by Gregory Locke on Saturday, February 4, 2017

“I got on the subway in Manhattan tonight and found a Swastika on every advertisement and every window. The train was silent as everyone stared at each other, uncomfortable and unsure what to do.

One guy got up and said, “Hand sanitizer gets rid of Sharpie. We need alcohol.” He found some tissues and got to work.

I’ve never seen so many people simultaneously reach into their bags and pockets looking for tissues and Purel. Within about two minutes, all the Nazi symbolism was gone.

Nazi symbolism. On a public train. In New York City. In 2017.

‘I guess this is Trump’s America,’ said one passenger. No sir, it’s not. Not tonight and not ever. Not as long as stubborn New Yorkers have anything to say about it.”

We Must Find Humor Where We Can Now

“Damage report.” Picard sat down into the chair and braced himself for his worst nightmare.

The previous few days were like this:

“Damage Report.”

“The Environmental Protection Agency has been frozen.”

“Damage Report.”

“There has been a gag order issued in the quadrant.”

“Damage report.”

“There is now a form of warpdrive that hurts space being used. It is speeding up the process of making black holes.”

“There is a protective anti-transporter barrier being built around the planet as we speak.”

Picard leaned back, half afraid to say it. Those five words, “What else can go wrong?” He rubbed the bridge of his nose feeling annoyed and dread. Dripping dread. The dreaded statement. It was as though the year 2017 was happening, from what little documentation remained from earth, all over again. What the hell was going on down there on Earth? Why was there a xenophobic human in charge of Star Fleet? Captain Kirk did not retire for this. What was next? Taking Earth out of the UFP? It would hurt Star Fleet as a whole. He didn’t expect this to happen. Honestly. He voted for Janeway. Where would they go? The crew went out into space to explore and meet new civilizations. He didn’t want to go back to Earth. Families were aboard the Enterprise.  They could always go to Alpha Centauri and re-establish Star Fleet Command from there.  Earth was returning to its isolationist state. The admirals had been planning for that and had informed Picard of this contingency plan among other captains. They were report there when the threatening, very conservative started turning issuing executive orders. People were likely leaving in the dozens by this news.

What is next?

Specie migration/immigration being pulled to a halt? And escorted from Earth?

“Captain. .  .”

Picard lowered his hand after careful consideration.

“Plot course for Alpha Centauri.”

It made him sick to think this was really happening. He couldn’t believe it wasn’t a trick pulled by Q. God, did he wish that it was the case. Many of the crew members shared his feelings. Data,Geordi, Deanna,Worf, Wesley.  . . Never mind that Wesley was his son who also happened to be a entity. Unity was the strength of Star Fleet. Never mind how Military like it had become. The main goal was to explore. God, the next president had to be better than this man.

“Aye, Captain.”

Quote Of The Day

These are not normal times. These are extraordinary times. And extraordinary times call for extraordinary measures. When you have a spokesperson for the president of the United States wrap up a lie in the Orwellian phrase “alternative facts”…

When you have a press secretary in his first appearance before the White House reporters threaten, bully, lie, and then walk out of the briefing room without the cajones to answer a single question…

When you have a President stand before the stars of the fallen CIA agents and boast about the size of his crowds (lies) and how great his authoritarian inaugural speech was….

These are not normal times. The press has never seen anything like this before. The public has never seen anything like this before. And the political leaders of both parties have never seen anything like this before.

What can we do? We can all step up and say simply and without equivocation. “A lie, is a lie, is a lie!” And if someone won’t say it, those of us who know that there is such a thing as the truth must do whatever is in our power to diminish the liar’s malignant reach into our society.

There is one group of people who can do a lot – very quickly. And that is Republicans in Congress. Without their support, Donald Trump’s presidency will falter. So here is what I think everyone in the press must do. If you are interviewing a Paul Ryan, a Mitch McConnell, or any other GOP elected official, the first question must be “what will you do to combat the lying from the White House?” If they dodge and weave, keep with the follow ups. And if they refuse to give a satisfactory answer, end the interview.

Facts and the truth are not partisan. They are the bedrock of our democracy. And you are either with them, with us, with our Constitution, our history, and the future of our nation, or you are against it. Everyone must answer that question.” ~ Dan Rather

And Of Course…

…right on cue, the petulant, cheeto-faced man-child set to assume the Presidency in 11 days had a 3 am meltdown on Twitter over Meryl’s speech last night.

In the hours after after Hair Furor disgorged his early-morning missive, the army of his sycophants chimed in, led by the always death-warmed-over Kellyanne Conway, a.k.a. das Backpfeifengesicht, who appeared on Faux News to ask if Meryl was so concerned about the disabled why she didn’t mention the mentally-challenged boy who was tortured on Facebook during her speech.

The lack of self-awareness displayed by Trump supporters complaining that celebrities like Meryl should stay out of politics when they elected a reality TV star with no political background is just fucking deafening.

More than anything, it punctuates the shitgibbon’s lack of self-esteem. And again I have to ask, if this man is so thin-skinned that he will obsess about anyone who doesn’t bow down and kiss his tiny-handed ring by spewing out insults via Twitter, how is he going to react to a real crisis?

I don’t even want to think about it.

I believe what’s at the root of this insecurity is Trump knowing in his heart of hearts that he will never be loved or admired by people in a way that Meryl (or Obama, or any number of others he’s lashed out at) are—and it’s drives him crazy. Hell, he and his administration are actually shaping up to be the most resoundingly hated group of people ever to assume power in this country, and that’s a stink that he won’t ever be able to wash off no matter how many rim jobs he gets from his Nazi followers.


A Woman Just Stood Up To Trump’s Latest Outburst On Twitter – And America Is Cheering Her On

Thin-skinned Donald Trump didn’t like Saturday Night Live last night very much.

During the show he tweeted out the following, saying that the show was completely “unwatchable” and “not funny.”

When, in fact, it was actually very funny – and got a lot of fanfare for making fun of Donald Trump’s tweets, no less! Pretty ironic that he angrily tweeted about a show making fun of his tweets!

With that being said, one woman by the name of Danielle Muscato ended up going off on Donald Trump in his twitter feed in response to this latest outburst of his.

It was such a glorious beat down that it has to be shared.

Her message was instantly received by thousands and rose to the top of the Twitter feed and will no doubt be seen hundreds of thousands of people in the days to follow, and it should. It’s worth every bit of your time to read.

Danielle Muscato just said what half of America has been thinking for months now. 

Trying To Make Sense Of It All

I know it’s a losing proposition, but I was standing in the shower this morning trying to figure out where all this unbridled hate that’s running in the streets of this country has come from. Why now, and most importantly, what do the 25% of eligible voters who actually voted for the asshole and apparently agree with—or at least overlook—the overt racism Trump has vociferously denounced encouraged actually think is going to happen when the man assumes power?

Okay, for the sake of argument let’s assume that Trump gets his magic wall constructed (who is going to build it and exactly how the thing is actually going to get built remains another huge question) and somehow manages to successfully rip countless families apart and deport several million undocumented immigrants to Mexico. Do he or his minions have any idea what that is going to do to the economy? Do they seriously think that many people can be removed from the machinery of commerce without any negative repercussions? Do they even care?

“No, gol-durnit, because all those Mexicans are gonna be gone!”

I believe that not too long ago a group of regressive legislators in some southern hellhole tried to rid their state of all those pesky undocumented laborers and found themselves with millions of acres of cotton (or some agricultural product) rotting in the fields for lack of workers to pick it. Did all their state’s out-of-work white workers line up to take their places?

Of course they didn’t. BECAUSE AMERICANS DON’T WANT TO DO THESE JOBS. If they did there wouldn’t be a market for undocumented workers in the first place!

Who exactly do they think is going to pick their vegetables (or scrub their toilets, or pave their roads or perform the myriad other unskilled labor jobs that are ostensibly performed by non-whites—documented and otherwise—in this country)? Do they think their unemployed cousins, nieces, aunts, brothers, sisters, or other blood relatives are going to flood the employment offices in a rush to clean urinals? Are they willing to stand out there in the soon to be universal hundred plus degree summer heat and lay asphalt? (Because apparently not only are we going to withdraw from the Paris Climate Accord, but we’re actually going to roll back  existing environmental regulations as well, pretty much assuring that Florida will be completely underwater sooner rather than later—and considering the role that godforsaken state has played in recent elections that might not be such a bad thing.)

Of course they won’t…and they certainly aren’t going to agree to do it for minimum wage (which will probably also be abolished before long, come to think of it). But don’t worry—Trump is going to bring all those manufacturing jobs back to ‘murika!

Get ready for your shiny new iPhone to cost $2000—at least—if Apple is forced to bring their manufacturing back to these shores.

The people who seem to want to “make America great white again,” AKA the low information voters who apparently think the Cheeto-faced Shitgibbon is going to wave a magic wand and make all their lives better don’t really seem to have a clue about the unintended consequences of what Trump’s promises (if they’re even actually fulfilled) will do to their lives, because that would actually involve thinking beyond their blind racism. No, it’s easier to blame their own continued unemployment on the hoards of brown-skinned workers literally flooding across the border (Faux News said so!) instead of—I dunno—actually doing something about improving their skill sets so they are employable in a 21st century economy.

Are they prepared to take on their aging parents’ medical expenses after Medicare is wiped out? Do any of them have financial portfolios (or enough money stuffed in a sock under the mattress) that will provide the bare minimum of subsistence that Social Security would at least provide?

Somehow I seriously doubt that as well.

And who’s going to pay for their medical care after “Obamacare” is repealed?

And since we’re on the subject of rolling back all social progress of the last 80 years, can someone please tell me how preventing gays from marrying (or mixed races for that matter, because while nothing has been said about it I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to hear that’s coming once the easy targets have fallen)—or worse—is going to improve their marriages and their lives? In fact, how is taking away someone else’s rights supposed to increase your own? Just once I’d like to hear one of these troglodytes explain how that happens.


Over the past few days, I’ve stumbled upon a word that more of us should know as it so perfectly captures this moment in time. Commit this one to memory, because you’re probably going to want to use it often:

Kakistocracy n. (kak·is·toc·ra·cy / kækɪsˈtɑkɹəsi) Government by the worst persons; a form of government in which the worst persons are in power.

REUTERS/Christopher Aluka Berry

The origins of kakistocracy are actually pretty neat. The term was first used around 1829 and was coined as an opposite to “aristocracy”. It comes from the Greek “kakistos” or “worst”, which is the superlative form of “kakos” or “bad”. Switch the “k” to a “c” and you have the root of modern words like “cacophony”.

But here’s where it gets even more fun. “Kakos” is closely related to “Caco” or “defecate”. As we saw above, it’s essentially the same phonetic sounds and has similar modern words derived from it.

Today, you’ll find this in the Greek “Kakke” “human excrement”, Latin “cacare”, Irish “caccaim”, Serbo-Croatian “kakati”, Armenian “k’akor”, Old English “cac-hus” or “latrine”, Dutch “kak”, German “Kacke”, and the school-yard favorite “caca”.

So in this trying time, remember the word “kakistocracy”.

Quite literally, government by the shittiest.



“We have had enough of the hatreds [this man Trump] has unleashed and the apologists in the media who have not stood up and have called him what he is: a fascist who wants to end this democracy.”

There’s nothing patriotic about the lunatic outrage of the angry white male Trump voter. Real Americans have had enough.