My President…

Via Random Thoughts…

I don’t care what your politics are. I don’t care if you liked the man or not. He has always been a positive force for change in our country. We as a people can keep the positive force going. Smile more, laugh, love, and most importantly… tell some wickedly awful dad jokes!

"Merry Christmas everybody!…Celebrating the holidays in the White House over these past eight years has been a true privilege. We’ve been able to welcome over half a million guests, our outstanding pastry chefs have baked 200,000 holiday cookies, and Barack has treated the American people to countless dad jokes. Although a few got a Frosty reception." —President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama celebrating their final holiday season at the White House. Join them in supporting America’s service members at JoiningForces.gov.

Posted by The White House on Saturday, December 24, 2016

Extrapolating On An Idea

“The plan is progressing as expected,” The Architect said to no one in particular in the invisible mothership as he moved his first set of forelimbs to tap commands on the translucent panel before him. As they had done on countless worlds before, his species had intentionally crashed one of their piloted drones on the world beneath him sixty or so solar revolutions ago, setting it down where the curious ape culture would most assuredly find and retrieve it.

It was a process The Architect knew by heart and one his people had perfected in their never-ending quest to invade and conquer every habitable planet they encountered. His was a patient species; it would often take millennia for the seeds they planted at a civilization’s dawn to flower and bear fruit. And yet this was necessary. While intelligent beyond measure, in relation to the vast majority of the species they encountered and set their sights upon, they were physically weak and could easily be vanquished if not for their well-honed subterfuge and weaponry.

The scouting parties started the process. They would send down biological entities created in the image of the dominant species to build religions—or augment any that might already be existing—by performing “miracles” and claiming divine providence and then just as quickly spirit them away, knowing full well that over the course of centuries the stories of the heavenly visitors would fracture and splinter into a hundred different sects, all eventually hell-bent on destroying each other. The Architect’s people kept an discreet eye on this huge catalog of planets during the process, carefully crafting their next phase of the operation based on how a civilization developed, and leveraging its weakest points to their full advantage.

Once a species reached a certain level of technological development—usually signaled by the detonation of a nuclear device—an event the detonating species never realized reverberated across the cosmos—The Architect’s people would begin Phase 2. They would intentionally crash a drone ship onto the planet loaded with just enough technology to whet the appetite of the dominant species, knowing full well that curiosity would cause that technology to be reverse-engineered and—spawned by government and industry (either directly or indirectly) become woven into the very fabric of their civilization and ultimately completely dependent upon it.

Hidden in that technology, and undetectable to those who reverse-engineered and later extrapolated upon it, was a universal kill switch. At the appointed time, the Architect would extend an extremity and with a flick across that translucent panel completely disable a civilization. No communication, no commerce, no flow of energy or supplies. Indeed, even most of the weapons capable of making a dent in The Architect’s invading armies would be rendered useless. In any case, it wouldn’t matter. Once the flow of electrons was cut off, the society would collapse into chaos, the multitudes of warring religious factions would take it as a sign of divine judgment and self-immolate fairly quickly, leaving only a paltry shadow of the planetary civilization behind; one incapable of rebuilding the kind of infrastructure and communications necessary required to defend itself against the conquering hordes of the Architect’s people.

Some Tumblr Thoughts

1. Do not kill yourself. Killing yourself is very messy and your friends and family will cry over you. It is not beautiful or brave, and even if it was, you will not be around to see that.

2. Washing your hair is going to be a chore. But you should do it anyway. Because you will feel better about yourself.

3. Get up late. Have a lay in. Sleep past your alarm. You have a very long life ahead of you and for now you should appreciate the cold side of your pillow.

4. He is going to break your heart but he’s just another male human who finds it hard to deal with Mondays, too. So in a month you’ll wake up and you won’t even remember that little scar on his knuckle you kissed.

5. Don’t spend hours looking up what your name means on google. Your name is your name and you should go out there and do heroic and good deeds and give your name your own meaning.

6. Don’t fight your demons. Your demons are here to teach you lessons. Sit down with your demons and have a drink and a chat and learn their names and talk about the burns on their fingers and scratches on their ankles. Some of them are very nice.

7. Music is good for your soul. Rap music will energise you and boost your ego and pop music will cheer you up. Indie music will make you think and emotional songs will make you cry and think about that boy again. It’s healthy.

8. Victim complexes are not attractive. Boys and girls will not date you because you are sad. They are not going to date you and kiss your aching bones and cure you of your dragging depression. Wake up. Take a bath. Do your hair. Be attractive.

9. Sadness is not poetic. Depression is not beautiful. Laying in bed all day and eating too much is lazy and disgusting and it is not tragic or pretty. Get up. Go outside. Let the sun warm your bones. Live.

10. If it makes you happy, buy twenty of it. Dedicate your life to it. Print it on T-shirts and collect things and draw art of it. Do not care what people think. They are the unhappy people you need to avoid. The abuse they will hurl at you is painless compared to how sad they are. Pity them. Remain happy.

11. You are allowed to he angry. But the world is not working against you. The flowers do not bloom for you and when your mother shouts ask her if she is okay instead of thinking she hates you. She never will. The world walks beside you and is silent. It does not trip you up or carry you.

12. Day and night cycles are natural. Humans only sleep at night because we used to avoid predators in the dark because of our poor eyesight. Stay awake until 5am watching bad reality shows. Wake up at 7pm and have breakfast.

13. Eat when you are hungry. Being bored does not constitute a chocolate bar. Sleep when you are tired. Do not mindlessly obey the sleep at night rule. If you are not tired, do not sleep.