The Disruption of Orange Caligula

Despite the fact that he has failed at pretty much every endeavor he’s set his tiny hands to, the current illegitimate occupant of the White House has succeeded spectacularly at one thing: absolutely monopolizing the entire “fake news” cycle—that he so loathes—24/7.

Even yesterday, as nature was putting on one of the most awe-inspiring spectacles imaginable, the shitgibbon still managed—through his own blatantly willful stupidity (as I predicted), made it all about him.

I mean seriously. If someone in a lab coat told the idiot not to touch a hot stove, I’m sure he’d think, “No one can tell me what to do…especially some scientist.”

And we saw that yesterday.

And now he’s flying into Phoenix to hold a “rally.” I guess widdle Donny’s ego needs to be stroked after the last couple weeks. Oh hell, after the last eight months. Is it possible that it’s finally pushing through his thick, malignantly narcissistic skull that except for his knuckle-dragging, basement-dwelling base, everyone is coming to hate him?

All I know is that this Phoenix trip is going to be a shit show. Both sides are planning on infiltrating the other to cause trouble. Supposedly the anti-Trumpers are buying up tickets and will be staging a mass walk-out the moment the tiny-fisted ferret-wearing shitgibbon starts blathering incoherently. In other words, the moment he starts speaking.

Meanwhile, the Trumpanzees are openly advertising for actors (preferably of color) to pose as anti-Trump protestors (at $10/hour) to cause trouble so Dear Leader can claim with his trademark smirk, “See, both sides are violent!”

My employer has taken note of this gathering tsunami of stupid about to descent upon the city. I work about two blocks from the state capitol building, and yesterday we received a call and email from our supervisor:

As a follow-up to this morning’s Deputy Director’s meeting, here is guidance regarding tomorrow for our employees specifically in the Capitol Complex/Campus, and Phoenix Metro areas. For employee safety, we are making the following options available for Division Directors to use based on your discretion and individual business needs:

If employees are non-essential (as deemed per individual Division Directors) and have the ability to telecommute, the recommendation is to have them do so. Employees are not required to physically come to the Capitol Complex/Campus/Phoenix Metro if they are not needed. However, if they do, then we’d like them to leave the area no later than 1 p.m. as there are reports of large protests, not to mention traffic congestion in preparation for the arrival and event.

Additionally, all facilities in the area locked down at 1 p.m. to preclude any general public entry and for the safety of our employees.

Only the senior tech at my facility will be on site; myself and my other colleague were requested to telecommute. One of the perks of being a contract employee, however, is that I’m not trusted with the keys to the remote access kingdom. Asked what to do about this, my supervisor replied, “Put down 8 hours on your time sheet and enjoy your day off.”

This actually works out well, because I was already planning on calling out today anyway. Two weeks into the new school year, Ben has already brought home—and shared—the first incident of the upper respiratory creeping crud. He started exhibiting symptoms last Friday, and I knew I’d be feeling it within 48 hours. Sure enough, it started to hit shortly after I got finished putting the new bed frame together (another story for another time) on Sunday. By the time I left work yesterday my throat was on fire, and this morning—after a horrible night’s sleep—I can tell it’s already moving down into my chest. I’m hoping to ward off full-blown bronchitis by hitting it hard with Mucinex to keep the sludge flowing, but I know how this typically goes, and I will undoubtedly be making an appointment with my Primary Care doctor by week’s end.

And now I’m going back to bed.

“I don’t understand any of it. I never did.”

In my mind, that is probably the most memorable quote from the 1970 film, Boys in the Band. It was spoken by the character Michael as he was relating his dying father’s last words.

I first saw the film during my senior year in high school. I went with my then-“girlfriend,” Jean. Not really having any media representations of gay life at the time, Boys in the Band—as bleak and depressing as it was—did offer a glimpse into at least some aspect of the life I was taking my first, tentative steps into—if only as a warning of what not to become. (I returned for a second screening on my own a week later, and Jean’s response was, “Why?!”)

But I digress.

As I’ve grown older, those words have rung more true with each passing year.

When I was in my 20s and 30s, I thought had it all figured out. I knew how life worked—even if it didn’t always work out the way I intended. The cracks started appearing in that belief as I entered my 40s, and when cancer came out of nowhere and hit me up the side of the head mid-decade, I realized I didn’t know shit.

When you’re twenty-one, life is a roadmap. It’s only when you get to be twenty-five or so that you begin to suspect you’ve been looking at the map upside down, and not until you’re forty are you entirely sure. By the time you’re sixty, take it from me, you’re…lost.” ~ Stephen King

Guess I’m not the only one…

Because ‘murika!

A large portion of the population is about to have permanent eye damage.

If the last two years have taught me anything, it’s that a huge portion of the United States population is dumber than a box of rocks, and will do something contrary to what they’re told, especially if the person telling them is actually someone who knows what they’re talking about.

Just When You Think…

…nothing more vile can come out of that Shitgibbon’s mouth, he proves us all wrong.

As if we needed any more proof, today it became abundantly clear we have a literal Nazi sympathizer in the Oval Office. Even the bimbos at Faux News were left shaking their heads in total and complete disbelief at what Twitler said this afternoon.

What, exactly, is the line this piece of excrement needs to cross before the Congress of the United States steps up and does what is needed? Yes, Pence is abominable, but he’s caught up in Mueller’s investigation and is as knee-deep in Russian collusion as Trump himself so he can be removed just as quickly. That leaves Paul Ryan as next in line, but even he is involved with Russia.

That leaves Orrin Hatch. At least he won’t nuke another country because someone dissed him on Twitter.

It Was Fun For a While (NSFW)

…but I just can’t anymore. My name ended up on the RNCC mailing list after responding to their initial survey on how the Shitgibbon-in-Chief was doing several months ago. For a while it was fun responding to their weekly—or increasingly daily—email money begs with appropriately disgusting graphics telling them in no uncertain terms how I felt, but after Charlottesville, that’s changed. Telling them to go fuck themselves isn’t sufficient. I realized that as long as was on their mailing list, they viewed me as a de facto supporter, and I could not have that.

So I unsubscribed after sending one final image.

A Leopard Cannot Change His Spots

Over the next four decades, Trump burnished his reputation as a bigot: he was accused of ordering “all the black [employees] off the floor” of his Atlantic City casinos during his visits; claimed “laziness is a trait in blacks” and “not anything they can control”; requested Jews “in yarmulkes” replace his black accountants; told Bryan Gumbel that “a well-educated black has a tremendous advantage over a well-educated white in terms of the job market”; demanded the death penalty for a group of black and Latino teenagers accused of raping a jogger in Central Park (and, despite their later exoneration with the use of DNA evidence, has continued to insist they are guilty); suggested a Native American tribe “don’t look like Indians to me”; mocked Chinese and Japanese trade negotiators by doing an impression of them in broken English; described undocumented Mexican immigrants as “rapists”; compared Syrian refugees to “snakes”; defended two supporters who assaulted a homeless Latino man as “very passionate” people “who love this country”; pledged to ban a quarter of humanity from entering the United States; proposed a database to track American Muslims that he himself refused to distinguish from the Nazi registration of German Jews; implied Jewish donors “want to control” politicians and are all sly negotiators; heaped praise on the “amazing reputation” of conspiracy theorist Alex Jones, who has blamed America’s problems on a “Jewish mafia”; referred to a black supporter at a campaign rally as “my African-American”; suggested the grieving Muslim mother of a slain U.S. army officer “maybe … wasn’t allowed” to speak in public about her son; accused an American-born Hispanic judge of being “a Mexican”; retweeted anti-Semitic and anti-black memes, white supremacists, and even a quote from Benito Mussolini; kept a book of Hitler’s collected speeches next to his bed; declined to condemn both David Duke and the Ku Klux Klan; and spent five years leading a “birther” movementthat was bent on smearing and delegitimizing the first black president of the United States, who Trump also accused of being the founder of ISIS.

Oh and remember: we knew all of this before he was elected president of the United States of America.